Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Finding That Perfect Roommate!

Hi my name is Alysia. I like long walks on the beach, *NSYNC, rom-coms, and anything with Morgan Freeman. Okay, I’m joking—well kind of. But finding your perfect roommate match is a bit like Internet dating. You have to ask all those important questions, such as, “How clean/ neat are you?” “What time do you go to bed?” and “Which way do you pronounce gif?” so that you ensure that your lives together won’t be one big conflict.

You want someone who is like you smart, clever, attractive, the full package— but also different enough so you won’t hate him or her by the end of the year. This can be hard because we tend to think rooming with our friends is a great way to go. “I mean we’re best friends! We’ll get along beautifully! We spend everyday together anyway.” Exactly, you spend every day together.

When you don’t live with your friends you have a place to escape all the drama at the end of the day. If you live with a friend, that escape is lost. Now you’re spending most of your day, and night, with the same person. It may make your friendship 100 times stronger, but even so, you won’t really meet all the amazing people this campus has to offer because you’ve become comfortable with the same core group of friends.

On the other hand, spending everyday together could amplify all those little quirks you never really liked about your friend. Next thing you know you’re spending less time together during the day because you just can’t take spending 24-7 together. Neither instance leads to a failed friendship, but rooming with a close friend can definitely change the dynamic.

Instead, your best bet is to find an acquaintance similar to you but possessing all the qualities you wish you had. These acquaintances are most likely not hanging around you all day, so you can come home to new conversation, new points of view, and a new friendship dynamic.

To give a you solid example, I’m a hermit. Staying in my room watching Netflix, scrolling through Tumblr, and listening to music is a good time to me. However, I’ve heard that’s not how you’re supposed to live your life, so I chose a roommate who likes to do things off campus and visit new places. I still get on Tumblr and watch Netflix, but now I also get to go do things with her and her friends on weekends and evenings. I’ve been able to balance my daytime life with my home life and push myself to do things I wasn’t doing before.

One of the greatest aspects about living with a roommate is creating a home dynamic with them. There are things you do in public and there are things you do at home. Keeping these things separate allows you to feel like you’re actually going home at night and not just sleeping in your locker.